tkitezb's blog

17:18 Polish Porno

Hey people. I am in Poland at the moment, and from what I've heard, some of the porno here and in the rest of Europe is something to behold.

Seriously. I'm sure you're all aware of the existence of 'dubbing' - that is, to say, I'm sure you've seen a Japanese film about martial arts, and English dubbing has been placed over the top of the original voices...

Well, over here, and also in other parts of Europe, even pornos are dubbed. Can you image, things like 'tak, tak' being dubbed with 'yes yes'?

Weird, right?

What's even weirder is the fact that some of the pornos are dubbed by a lector. That is to say, both the male AND the female voices are done by the same guy. Only a male voice. Giving translations to the female voices.

Urgh!




5:57 The 'Hitler Wank'

A couple of weeks back, I was round a friend's house. I went to the toilet and shut the door behind me. He called to me while I was in there:

"Yo #@$%, you're not having a Hitler wank in there, are you?"

To which I replied:

"What's a Hitler wank?"

He explained that a Hitler wank was to do with public toilets, and the way you have to hold the door of a cubicle shut if it doesn't have a lock. I found it funny, and I hope you do too, even if it does sound a bit wierd.

If you have any anecdotes or stories about random things like that, please do share...




4:38 July - Want to see a new picture?

Half way through the year. Luckily, my sex life hasn't been boring, but shall I spill the sordid details?

I've got a camera now, and I'm keen for a new picture. Thing is, I'm far to lazy to think for myself, so I'll do a request, as long as it's not completely sick/weird/ridiculous.

PS: Don't leave my blog hanging unanswered. It'll hurt my feelings.




3:23 April

Can't believe it's actually April. Logged on today to see the new talent, and I'm not disappointed. There are some very hot girls in the top boobs list! Phew!




3:30 March

Weather is getting better. Can't wait until summer is here and girls wear bikinis




16:45 Favourite type of bed.

Sofabeds don't rule. Aside from the convenience of them folding away, they are flimsy and fragile, and don't perform well under pressure. To top it all off they are often too short, and my feet hang out of the end.

Ahem. Please excuse my personal war against sofabeds, but I broke my girlfriend's sofabed for the second time last night. Luckily she didn't seem to mind. I fixed it today. They aren't that difficult to repair, but in my opinion, a good sturdy bed is by far the better option.

If I could have any bed I wanted, I would have a king size four posted bed. Opinions...? Similar experiences?




11:24 Moved

To Poland! YAY! It's great over here and I'm staying with my gf. New photo of us on the way, you wanna see? :)




6:29 penis names

i've read on occasion in the past that men often name their own penis. i've never done this. what should i do? got any suggestions?




10:29 videos

would videos be a good idea on this site, or would they simply be pornographic, boring, or embarrassing?




7:28 Vulgar Terms

When people use vulgar terms like 'fuck-stick' and 'fuck-hole' it really gets on my tits. Maybe I am just a stickler, but I prefer the words 'cock' and 'pussy'.

When people use such vulgar terms I find it creepy. For me, it takes away some of the enjoyment, and, I think people need new words. So.... here is:

The Cock & Pussy Thesaurus

Penis [noun]
AKA: Cock, Dick, Shlong, Dong, Wang, Knob

Vagina [noun]
AKA: Pussy, Fanny, Fanjita, Minge, Twat, Cunt [risque]

Breasts [noun]
AKA: Boobs, Bosom, Tits, Funbags, Love Pillows, Lady Lumps, Cans, Knockers, Norks [yeah - really]

Any more?




20:38 does anyone actually like my new pic?

i went to great incovenience and personal expense to produce that... extravagance! [sarcasm - more like it cost zero but some black card and a pair of scissors] and i think it's original.

what do you think? comments. please. i dont usually ask for them... funny? sad? freaky/ right? wrong?

fishing for comments




9:33 RateMyEgo.com

Why do we use this site?
Do we use it as some kind of cheap ego boost? Just a thought.

The site sure is addictive. It's so great to find a message or comment from somebody. It makes you feel good. About yourself. The site is naughty fun and should be positive only.

I find it a shame when I see negative comments about people. These are people. They have feelings. For me, it's a disappointing reminder of the world we live in.



3:7 a night outside

went to club last night. just got back. police caught me sleeping at train station.

now i'm stuck in bed. all day, it seems. alone. who's going to join me?

(bearing in mind, i'm very very horny and could pound pussy for hours!)




13:51 The IF game...

Take the resulting clause, and make a new conditional. I know it sounds wierd, so... FOR EXAMPLE:

1. If I were rich, I would go to London...
2. If I went to London, I would visit the Queen...
3. If I visited the Queen, we would have dinner...
4. If we had dinner, we'd have wine...
5. If we had wine, we'd probably drink the lot...
6. If we drank the lot, we'd go to the beer-shop...
7. If we went to the beer-shop, the Queen would be seen drunk in public...
8. If the Queen were to be seen drunk in public, I'd be arrested...
9. If I were arrested, I'd be locked up...
10. If I were locked up, I wouldn't have access to RMB....

So, now.... Let's begin:



11:31 damn

hiya

its been a long time since i logged in. mainly because i completely forgot my password, but surprise surprise, i remembered it, hence, why i am typing this now...

duh? why did i say that?

back up north now. far from bournemouth.

great to get away, and great to be home.
win - win
nice :)

xxx